dea_eruditio on Xanga

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Oh wow I haven't xanga-d since early college days... now i'm married and expecting my first baby! Wonder if Xanga can keep up!

I'm not writing any more on here. For obvious reasons. You can ask for my "new" site if you want, I'm not guaranteeing I'll give it to anyone who asks.

hello. I went to bed last night with a stomachache, and the jitters. I was actually twitching. Girls and boys, that is what stress does to you. And it isn't even my freakin stress!! Mark says I need to stop worrying so much or taking on so much stress, or something like that. He's probably right (that would follow the pattern at least). But... he doesn't understand that it's not that easy. Sometimes you can't choose your worries, or select which stress you will allow to affect you today. Life just happens, and the people you love do hurtful, stressful things. Because you love them, you care. Because you care, you worry. Because you worry, well, there's the stress. Does anyone else understand this? I can't just not be stressed. Unless I gave up love.

I adore Jason Mraz' new song, Wordplay. Who wouldn't? I checked out his website for the first time today... amusing journal entry. I'll be goin back.

I'm tan. Oh yes (yeah, yeah, maybe a teensy bit of red on my shoulders). Spendin the day on the river in Missouri (don't ask me which one) is apparently good for the skin as well as the soul. I had an awesome weekend overall, loved seeing my aunt, uncle, and their large brood of not-completely-related children - it's the most blended family I've ever seen! My 3 week old cousin is beyond adorable... Koltlynn Dwain (a boy in case you can't tell from the... uh.. odd name). I held him a lot... oh god... I want one of my own SO BAD. I can't fathom waiting years to have kids. How could anyone NOT want to have kids? I guess I do want to wait until I finish college, but hey, that's only two years from now. But then there's a lot that should happen before I think about kids. Why is it that my timetable and God's never quite line up? Six months ago I was planning on being married now, six weeks ago I didn't want a boyfriend, much less a husband, for anything in the world. Today... well... I guess I'll keep those thoughts to myself for now. I've babbled on long enough. Seriously... wow.

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